Morning Jokes.

Dementia Test
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Here are four questions along with a bonus question.
You have to answer them instantly.
You can't take your time, just answer off the top of your head.
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First Question:
You are participating in a race.
You overtake the second person.
What position are you in?
Answer:
First?
Wrong!
If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second!
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Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?
Answer:
If you answered that you are second to last, then you're wrong again.
It's impossible to overtake the last person.
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Third Question:
This must be done in your head only.
Don't use paper and pencil or a calculator.
Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it.
Now add another 1000.
Now add 30.
Add another 1000.
Now add 20.
Now add another 1000
Now add.
10. What is the total?
 Answer.
Did you get 5000?
The correct answer is actually 4100.
Don't believe it?
Check with your calculator!
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Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono.
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Answer:
Nunu?
Of course not.
Her name is Mary.
Read the question again.
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Bonus Question (this one is really easy):
Again, without using a calculator or pencil and paper --
You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales.
In London, 17 people get on the bus.
In Reading, six people get off the bus, and nine people get on.
In Swindon, two people get off and four get on.
In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on.
In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on.
You then arrive at Milford Haven.
What was the name of the bus driver?
Answer:
What do you mean,
"How could I possibly know that?"
For crying out loud,
Don't you remember?
It was YOU!
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On the bright side, you don't have to feel so bad when you forget to
pick up eggs on the way home from work.