Afternoon Jokes.

Senior Personal Ads
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Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida and Arizona newspapers:
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FOXY LADY:

Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim,5'-4" (used to
be 5-6), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion.
Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
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MINT CONDITION:

Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts
including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but
walks well.
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LONG-TERM COMMITMENT:

Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband looking for someone to
round out a six- unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath
not a problem.
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SERENITY NOW:

I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and
meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our
hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
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WINNING SMILE:

 Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flossier
to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
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BEATLES OR STONES?

I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday
nights and still like to play the air guitar. If you were a groovy
chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and
Listen to my boss collection of eight-track tapes.
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MEMORIES:

I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember
Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

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Do You Know Your Judgment Day?
Fellow 1 : "Now my grandfather, he knew the exact day of the year that
he was going to die. It was the right year too. Not only that, but he
knew what time he would die that day, and he was right about that,
too."
Fellow 2 : "Wow, that's Incredible. How did he know all of that?"
Fellow 1 : "A judge told him."

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