Morning Jokes

Too Much Sugar
A fellow nurse at my hospital received a call from an anxious patient.
"I'm diabetic and I'm afraid I've had too much sugar today." the caller said.
"Are you light-headed?" my colleague asked.
"No," the caller answered, "I'm a brunette."
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Confucius Says:
- Man who stand on toilet high on pot.
- Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
- He who eats too many prunes, sits on potty many moons.
- Man who fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.
- Man who make love to girl on hill...he not on level.
- Honeymoon over when man who whispered sweet nothings before now say
nothing sweet.
- Man who jumps through screen door likely to strain himself.
- Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
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Mad Cow Disease
One day, two cows were chatting over the fence between their two fields.
The first cow said,
"I'm telling you, this mad cow disease is getting pretty scary! I've
heard it's spreading so fast that it's already on farmer Rubin's land
just down the road!"
The second cow replied,
"So what? It doesn't affect us chickens!"