XX - ADULT PUNS!

A clever woman I know wired up her vibrator to her bedside radio and
came up with the world's first radio alarm cock!

The Scottish farmer thought he'd caught a nasty STD.
But it turns out he was just allergic to wool.

We're at home watching TV.
I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing
channel and the porn channel.
She became more and more annoyed and finally said,
"For God's sake! Leave it on the porn channel! You already know how to fish!"

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed.
The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with
a satisfied smile on its face.
The egg, looking a bit pissed off, grabs the sheet and rolls over and says:
"Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question."

A young boy knows about sex and where babies come from because his
MOther told him that "the man puts his penis inside the woman and she
gets pregnant."
A few days later, after pondering this for some time, the boy asks in
all the innocence and wonder of a child,
"Does the man ever get his penis back?"