XX - ADULT PUNS!

Since I announced loudly at the local drugstore that I wanted some
extra large condoms, my wife has sure taken a lot of ribbing.

The big difference between hobos & homos is:
Hobos have no friends,
&
Homos have friends coming out their ass!

ADULTERY -
The wrong people doing the right thing.

The husband was angry when he found out that his wife had been cheating on him.
He shouts at her,
"I will play second fiddle to no one!"
The wife replies,
"Second fiddle? With your little flute you are lucky you are still in the band!"

Married sex is like ordering a Civil War chess set from the Franklin Mint.
Every four to six weeks you get a piece.