Monday, October 04, 2010

The Miracle Of Toilet Paper

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small.. Instead of characteristically
telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.

If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet
paper and rub it between them for a few seconds.'
Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in
front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. 'How long will
this take?' I asked.

They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband replies.

I stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between
my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?'

Without missing a beat he says, "Worked for your 'bum', didn't it?"

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk
again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a
straw.

Stupid, stupid man.