XXX - Laffs!

Raunchy..

Pastor Fuzz.
The Reverend John Fuzz was a pastor of a small congregation in a
little Pennsylvania town.
One day he was walking down Main Street and he happened to notice a
female member of his congregation sitting in the town bar, drinking
beer.
The reverend thought this was sinful and not something a member of his
congregation should do. He walked through the open door of the bar and
sat down next to the woman.
"Mrs. Fitzgerald," the reverend said sternly. "This is no place for a
member of my congregation. Why don't you let me take you home?"
"Sure," she said with a slur, obviously very drunk.
When Mrs. Fitzgerald stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth.
The reverend realized that she had had too much to drink and he
grabbed her arms to steady her.
When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor.
After rolling around for a few seconds, the reverend wound up laying
on top of Mrs.Fitzgerald, her skirt hiked up to her waist.
The bartender looked over the bar and said:
"Here, here buddy, we won't have any of that carrying around in this bar!"
The reverend looked up at the bartender and said:
"But, you don't understand, I'm Pastor Fuzz."
The bartender nodded and said:
"Hell then, if you're that far in, you might as well finish up!"

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Harley Guy.
A woman goes to her doctor's office, to discuss a strange development.
She has discovered a green spot on the inside of each thigh.
They won't wash off, they won't scrape off, and they seem to be getting worse.
The doctor assures her he'll get to the bottom of the problem, and
tells her not to worry until he gets the tests back.
A few days later, the woman's phone rings.
Much to her relief, it's the doctor.
She immediately begs to know what's causing the spots.
The doctor says:
"You're perfectly healthy--there's no problem. But, I'm wondering, is
your boyfriend a Harley guy?"
The woman stammers:
"Why, Yes, but how did you know?"
"Tell him his earrings aren't real gold."

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