Why women are luckier...

1. We got off the Titanic first.

2. We can scare male bosses with
mysterious 'gynaecological disorder' excuses.

3. We never 'ejaculate' prematurely.

4. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls and are
nice to us when we blow up our computers.

5. When we buy a vibrator it's glamorous. When men buy a blow-up doll,
it's pathetic.

6. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous. Guys look
complete idiots in ours.

7. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

8. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

9. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a
computer game.

10. Taxis stop for us.

11. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

12. We don't look like 'a frog in a blender' when dancing.

13. Free drinks, free dinners, free moving (you get the point?).

14. We can hug our friend, without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

15. We know the truth about - whether size matters.

16. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

17. If we have sex with someone and don't call the next day, we're not
the devil.

18. Condoms make no significant difference in our enjoyment of sex.

19. We can sleep our way to the top.

20. Nothing crucial can be 'cut off' with one clean sweep.

21. It is possible to live our whole lives - without ever taking a group shower.

22. No fashion 'faux pas' we make, could rival Speedos.

23. If we cheat on our spouse, people assume it's because we're being
emotionally neglected.

24. We never have to wonder if 'his orgasm' was real.

25. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

26. We can congratulate our teammate - without ever touching her arse.

27. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

28. We never have to reach down every so often, to make sure our privates
are still there.

29. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

30. We have an excuse to be a total bitch - at least once a month.

31. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture
them naked.

32. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look
like an idiot.

33. Our friends won't think we're 'weird' if we ask whether there's spinach
in our teeth.

34. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

35. Gay waiters don't make us uncomfortable.

36. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

37. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes