Singin' A Sad Song
Paul McCartney and his second wife Heather Mills have decided to call it
quits....The former Beatle is reportedly working on some new old music, dealing with
the breakup:
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Help!
I need a lawyer
Help!
Not just any lawyer
Help!
You know I need a judge
HELP!!!
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Yesterday
All my troubles seemed so far away
Now I need a place to hide away
A pre-nup might have saved the day
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Of all the loves I have won or have lost
There is one love I should never have crossed
Now she's a girl with my millions, my friend
I should have known she would win in the end
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You know I work all day
To get you money to buy you things
It's kinda shitty when I hear you say
That you'll be taking everything
-------
Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to screw me
-------
Now somewhere in the black mountain hills of Dakota
There lived a young bitch name a' Heather the Goon
And one day, this woman ran off with another guy
Hit ol' Pauly in the eye, Pauly didn't like that
He said I'm gonna get that git
So one day he walked into town
Booked himself a room in the local saloon
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Paul: "Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I'm 64?"
Heather: "No."
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At a party a guy cornered a young woman and whispered something in her
ear. "You filthy pervert!" she shrieked. "What makes you think I'd let
you do a thing like that to me? I would NEVER do a thing like THAT!"
Then her eyes narrowed and she hissed, "Unless you're the s.o.b. who
found my diary on the bus..."
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Subject: Punny Quickies
Q. What's the difference between a batman and a thief?
A. Batman can go without Robin.
Q. Why did the lady go outdoors with her purse open?
A. Because she expected some change in the weather.
Q. How do you attract a vegetarian?
A. Make a noise like a wounded vegetable.
Q. Which is worth more...an old ten dollar bill or a new one?
A. An old ten dollar bill is always worth more than a new ONE.
Q. What did the salt say to the pepper?
A. Season's Greetings.
Q. What flower is in between your nose and your chin?
A. Two lips!
Q. What's brown and sticky??
A. A stick.
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