How do these people survive??????????

ONE

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could
have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half
dozen nuggets.

"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.

"You don't?", I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the
reply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but can I order six?"

"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

TWO

I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the
lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up
one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed
it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had
scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all
over for the bar code so she could scan i t. Not finding the bar code
she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?"

I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today."

She said "OK," and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue
to what had just happened.

THREE
The lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive
and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was
doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking
for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you
need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote
door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they
(pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit
this?"

"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked.

"No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.

As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why
don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long
walk."

FIVE

Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day
she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of
typing paper. What do I do?"

Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that,
the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to
take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The
dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and should be fine,
the mother says, I just gave him some ant killer.....

Dispatcher: "Rush him in to the emergency!"

Life is tough... it's tougher if you're stupid

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