Wal-mart greeter
An office manager at Walmart was given the task of hiring an
individual to fill a job opening.
After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were
equally qualified --an American, a Russian, an Australian and a
Mexican.
He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their
answer would determine who of them would get the job.
The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the
interviewer asked,
"What is the fastest thing you know?"
Dave, the American, replied, "A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head.
There's no warning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is
the fastest thing I know of."
"That's very good!" replied the interviewer.
"And now you sir?" he asked Vladimir, the Russian. "Hmm ... let me
see. A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever
happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know."
"Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very
popular cliche for speed."
He then turned to George, the Australian who was contemplating his
reply. "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on
the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that
switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on.
Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of."
The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought
he had found his man."It's hard to beat the speed of light" he said.
Turning to Eleuterio, the Mexican, the fourth and final man, the
interviewer posed the same question. Eleuterio replied, "Apter herring
da 3 preybyus ansers sir, et's obyus to me dat
the fastest thing is Diarrhea."
"WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response. The others
were already giggling in their seats...
"Oh, I can expleyn sir,." said Eleuterio. " You see, sir, da ader day
my tummy was peeling bad and so I run so fast to the batrum, but
before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT,
I had alreydi shit in my pants!"
Eleuterio is now the new "Greeter" at Wal-Mart.
