MIHIN AIR

(For the benefit of those who are unaware of Mihin Air, it is the
airline launched by the President of Sri Lanka)

WELCOME TO MIHIN AIR!!!

"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain Wijepala ,
welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board Mihin Air .
We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad
weather and some overtime I had to put in at the bakery.

This is flight 717 to Mumbai. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we
will end up somewhere in India. And, if luck is in your favo ur, we
may even be landing on schedule!

Mihin Air has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety
standards are so high, that even LTTE terrorists are afraid to fly
with us!

It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of
our passengers have reached their destination.

If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can
arrange to turn them off!

To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve
complimentary Kiribath and Parippu.

For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can
help you find out if there really is a God !

We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be
shown as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our
movie buffs, we will be flying right next to Emirates Airline, where
their movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window.

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in
the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us
to slow down!

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as
possible for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do
let us know.
Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark!

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off
and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a
seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And,
for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in
touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to
your suitcase."

ENJOY MIHIN AIR!!!! !