Old Sea Captain..........

An old sea captain, and a little
guy who played the fiddle, were
arguing about women.

The old sea captain tells the little
fiddle player that women can't be
trusted, and they will not be faithful
under any circumstances.

The little fiddle player said well he
bet his wife would not do anything
like that.

So, the old sea captain said he would
bet his ship and cargo against the
fiddler player's violin that she would
be unfaithful.

The fiddle player took the bet, and invited
the sea captain over to his house, and
sent the two of them into the bedroom
while he waited outside the door.

A half hour went by and he heard nothing
from his wife, so he started singing to the
tune of Auld Lang Sine:

Be true, my love, be true my love,
It's only for an hour.
Don't screw, my love, don't screw, my love,
And the ship and cargo's ours.

She sang back to him:

Too late, my love, too late, my love,
He's got me round the middle,
He's screwed me once, he'll do it twice,
And you've lost your damned old fiddle!!!