Tom's Scrotum

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express
praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the
podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom,
had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed.
The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could
help him. " You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the
congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have
experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on,
"and every move caused him terrible pain. " We prayed as the doctors
performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to
piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire
around it to hold it in place. " Again, the men in the congregation
cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible
surgery performed on Tom. "Now," she announced in a quivering voice,
"thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that
with time, his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed
with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone
else had something to say. A man stood up and walked slowly to the
podium. He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its
breath.

"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."