Grandma

The family wheeled Grandma out on the lawn, in her wheelchair, where
the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place. Grandma
couldn't speak very well, but she would write notes when she needed to
communicate.

After a short time out on the lawn, Grandma started leaning off to the
right, so some family members grabbed her, straightened her up, and
stuffed pillows on her right.

A short time later, she started leaning off to her left, so again the
family grabbed her and stuffed pillows on her left.

Soon she started leaning forward, so the family members again grabbed
her, and then tied a pillowcase around her waist to hold her up.

A nephew who arrived late came up to Grandma and said, "Hi, Grandma,
you're looking good! How are they treating you?"

Grandma took out her little notepad and slowly wrote a note to the nephew...
"Bastards won't let me fart."