Gentle Thoughts ...

Birds of a feather flock together. . .
And
Then, shit on your car.

A penny saved is
A government oversight.

The older you get,
The tougher it is to lose weight,
Because by then your body
And
Your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is
To buy a replacement.

He who hesitates is
Probably right.

Did you ever notice:
The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.

If you can smile when things go wrong,
You have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is
So he can tell when he's really in trouble.

Did you ever notice:
When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together
It spells 'Theirs...'

Aging:
Eventually, you will reach a point when
You stop lying about your age
And
Start bragging about it.

Some people try to turn back their odometers.
Not me,
I want people to know 'why' I look this way.
I've traveled a long way
And
Some of the roads weren't paved.

When you are dissatisfied
And
Would like to go back to your youth,
Think of Algebra.

You know you are getting old
When everything either dries up or leaks.

One of the many things no one tells
You about aging is that it is
Such a nice change from being young.
Ah, being young is beautiful,
But being old is comfortable.

Lord,
Keep your arm around my shoulder
And
Your hand over my mouth. . .

AMEN!