XX ADULT PUNS!

Said Madam at small house of sin,
On greeting at door, two large men,
"I'm busy tonight
Although things are tight
Perhaps I can squeeze you both in"
(Gary Hallock)

I wouldn't want to fly Virgin.
Who'd want to fly an airline that doesn't go all the way?

Undoubtedly, the most infamous hotel (or motel to be precise) is the Bates
Motel of 'Psycho' movie fame.
They've done remakes of the movie, but I hear that someone would like to do
a remake which is half-horror, half-porno.  The new movie will be named the
'Master Bates Motel'.

I wish I could talk to my doctor about erectile dysfunction,
But for some reason it never comes up.

A guy runs into an ex-girlfriend, with whom he didn't have the greatest
relationship.
"You know, I was with another woman last night, but I was still thinking of
you."
"Why," she asks, "because you miss me?"
"No, because it keeps me from coming too fast."

What is the difference between a gigolo, a doctor, a rabbi, and a chorus
girl?
A gigolo is a penis vendor,
A doctor a penis mender,
A rabbi is a penis ender,
A chorus girl is a penis bender.

A guy picked this woman up in a nightclub and took her home.
While they were walking home he didn't say a thing.
"You're not the communicative type, are you?" she said as they were
undressing.
"Nah," he replied and pulled out his old fella.
"I do all my talking with this."
"Damn," said the girl as she leaned forward to look. "You don't have much to
say, do you?"

What's the definition of macho?
Jogging home from your vasectomy.


A lady enters the dental surgery, takes off her stockings, underwear, makes
herself comfortable in the chair, spreads her legs apart.
Dentist:
"Madam, are you sure you're in the right place? Probably, you need the
gynaecologist "
Lady:
"No. I'm in the right place all right. You made the dental plate for my
husband last week, didn't you? Now remove it, please."

The cheapest meat is deer balls,
They're under a buck.