One Liners***

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst,
For they are sticking to their diets.

Perhaps, you know why women over fifty don't have babies:
They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.

My mind not only wanders,
Sometimes it leaves completely.

Every time I think about exercise,
I lie down till the thought goes away.

I finally got my head together.
My body fell apart.

Age doesn't always bring wisdom.
Sometimes age comes alone.

Life not only begins at forty,
It begins to show.

Sometimes I think I understand everything,
Then, I regain consciousness.

You don't stop laughing because you grow old;
You grow old because you stop laughing.

I had to give up jogging for my health.
My thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.

Remember,
As we get older we no longer have hot flashes.
We now have power surges.