Children's Stuff.

JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister.

After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and

One for cold milk?"

MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was

So old she didn't remember any more.

Melanie said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your
panties. Mine say five to Six."

STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much,

That when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."

BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller.

She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle.

Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a childproof cap and
she'd have to open it for her.

Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?

SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups.

"Please don't give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."

DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I cost?"

MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked
his Dad:

"Why is he whispering in her mouth?"

CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked
what was troubling him, he replied,

"I don't know what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How
will my wife fit in?"

JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man
named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his
wife looked back and was turned to salt."

Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"

TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for awhile and then
asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"

The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget.... This particular
Sunday sermon..."Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended
toward Heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. "Without you,
we are but dust." He would have continued but at that moment my very
obedient daughter (who was listening!) Leaned over to me and asked
quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what is butt
dust?"