FDA Warning

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all containers:

Warnings:


The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the heck happened to your bra.

The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.

The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4:00 in the morning.

The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked.