XX ADULT PUNS!

In porn flicks the woman once starred.
The men who she works with regard
Her with lots of respect.
She can get them erect.
On old guys it's easy: blow hard.



She was in the kitchen doing the boiled eggs for breakfast.
He walks in and she says,
"You've got to make love to me this very moment".
He, thinking it's his lucky day, gives her one over the kitchen table.
Afterwards he says,
"What was that all about?"
She says,
"the egg timer's broken!"

A man was sitting at a bar, morosely staring at his untouched beer.
The bartender walked over with a sigh, and asked,
"What's the problem, pal?"
"My brother just told me that there's a sperm bank in his neighbourhood that
pays $40 for a donation!" said the dejected gent.
"Yeah, so?" replied the barkeep.
"Don't you get it?" the man cried out. "I've already let a fortune slip
through my fingers!"

On wall in ladies room:
"My husband follows me everywhere"
Written just below it:
"I do not"

A guy cuddled up to his wife and softly whispered into her ear:
"Could we make love, please dear?"
She rolled over away from him.
"Not tonight, darling, I've got a splitting headache," she replied rather
tersely.
Too horny to read the obvious signals the husband pleaded.
"Please, honey. I'll only stick it in for a minute"
"What do you think I am," his wife retorted, "A fuckin' microwave?"

Good girls loosen a few buttons when its hot.
Bad girls make it hot by loosening a few buttons.
Naughty girls unbutton your pants.