Monday, February 07, 2011

You've just got to love the British sense of humour.

This is very un pc but very funny.

Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque..
They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.
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Two Asian heroin addicts have injected themselves with curry powder by
mistake - both are in intensive care...
One has a dodgy tikka and the other one is in a korma..
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During last night's high winds an African family were killed by a falling tree.
A spokesman for the Birmingham City council said "We didn't even know
they were living up there".
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Jamaican minorities in the UK have complained that there are not
enough television shows with minorities in mind, so Crimewatch is
being shown 5 times a week now.
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I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a
fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.
I shouted up to him, "what's up Abdul, won't it start?"
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A Muslim dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates..

He is very excited, as all his life he has longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.
Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, he meets a man with a beard.

"Are you Mohammed?" he asks.

"No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up." And he points to a ladder that
rises into the clouds.

Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, he climbs the
ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds coming to a room
where he meets another bearded man.

He asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"

"No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher still."

Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy he continues to climb the
ladder and, yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets
another man with a beard.

Full of hope, he asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"

"No, I am Jesus... You will find Mohammed higher up."

Mohammed higher than Jesus!

The poor man can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher.
Once again he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard
and repeats his question:

"Are you Mohammed?" he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath
from all his
climbing.

"No my son.....I am God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a coffee?"

"Yes, please, my Lord."

God looks behind him, claps his hands and calls out:

"Hey Mohammed, two coffees !!!!"