Should I really join Facebook? (priceless)

 A good laugh for people in the over 60 group !!!
Also for those who know people like us.

When I bought my Blackberry I thought about the 30-year business I ran
with 1,800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes
videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter.

I signed up under duress for Twitter and Facebook, so my seven kids,
their spouses, 13 grand-kids and 2 great grand kids could communicate
with me in the modern way.
I figured I could handle something as simple as Twitter with only 140
characters of space.

That was before one of my grand-kids hooked me up for Tweeter,
Tweetree, Twhirl, Twitterfon, Tweetie and Twittererific Tweetdeck,
Twitpix and something that sends every message to my cell phone and
every other program within the text-ing world.

My phone was beeping every three minutes with the details of
everything except the bowel movements of the entire next generation.
I am not ready to live like this.
I keep my cell phone in the garage in my golf bag.

The kids bought me a GPS for my last birthday because they say I get
lost every now and then going over to the grocery store or library.
I keep that in a box under my tool bench with the Blue tooth [it's
red] phone I am supposed to use when I drive.
I wore it once and was standing in line at Barnes and Noble talking to
my wife and everyone in the nearest 50 yards was glaring at me.
I had to take my hearing aid out to use it, and I got a little loud.

I mean the GPS looked pretty smart on my dash board, but the lady
inside that gadget was the most annoying, rudest person I had run into
in a long time.
Every 10 minutes, she would sarcastically say, "Re-calc-u-lating."
You would think that she could be nicer.
It was like she could barely tolerate me.
She would let go with a deep sigh and then tell me to make a U-turn at
the next light. Then if I made a right turn instead.
Well, it was not a good relationship.

When I get really lost now, I call my wife and tell her the name of
the cross streets and while she is starting to develop the same tone
as Gypsy, the GPS lady, at least she loves me.

To be perfectly frank, I am still trying to learn how to use the
cordless phones in our house.
We have had them for 4 years, but I still haven't figured out how I
can lose three phones all at once and have run around digging under
chair cushions and checking bathrooms and the dirty laundry baskets
when the phone rings.

The world is just getting too complex for me.
They even mess me up every time I go to the grocery store.
You would think they could settle on something themselves but this
sudden "Paper or Plastic?" every time I check out just knocks me for a
loop.
I bought some of those cloth reusable bags to avoid looking confused,
but I never remember to take them in with me.

Now I toss it back to them.
When they ask me, "Paper or Plastic?"
I just say,
"Doesn't matter to me. I am bi-sacksual."
Then, it's their turn to stare at me with a blank look.
I was recently asked if I tweet.
I answered,
No, but I do toot a lot."

P.S.
I know some of you are not over 60.
I sent it to you to allow you to forward it to those who are.