Negative People

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair  styled for a trip
to Rome with  her husband..  She mentioned the trip to the
hairdresser, who  responded:

" Rome ?  Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded  and dirty..
You're crazy to go  to Rome .  So, how are you getting  there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?"  exclaimed the hairdresser. " That's a terrible
airline. Their planes are old, their flight  attendants are ugly, and
they're always late.  So, where are you staying  in Rome ?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River
called Teste."

"Don't  go any further. I know that place.   Everybody thinks its
gonna be something  special and exclusive, but it's really a  dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's  rich," laughed the hairdresser. You and a  million other
people trying to see him.   He'll look the size of an  ant.

Boy,  good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're  going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in for a  hairdo. The hairdresser
asked her about her trip  to Rome.

"It  was wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in
one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they
bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I
had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot.

And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5  million remodeling
job, and now it's a jewel,  the finest hotel in the city. They, too,
were  overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their  owner's suite
at no extra charge!"

"Well,"  muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and  good, but I
know you didn't get to see the  Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a
Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope
likes to  meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind  as to step
into his private room and wait, the  Pope would personally greet  me.

Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked  through the door and
shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."

"Oh,  really!  What'd he say ?"

He said: "Who f----ed up your hair?"