XX - Gaffs from TV (Adult)

Michael Burke, on watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male
astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UKeclipse coverage, remarked:
"They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only
come in his shorts."

Ken Brown, commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny
Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open:
"Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it
by himself."

Mike Hallett, discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports:
"Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."

Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edwards' tyre choice on World
Superbike racing:
"Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a
hard on now."

Chris Tarrant, discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel
On This Morning:
"She was practicing fastest finger first by herself in bed last night."

'Winning Post's' Stewart Machin, commentating on jockey Tony McCoy's
formidable lead:
"Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees."

Ross King, discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond:
"Well Phil, tell us about your amazing third leg."

Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire
match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe:
"With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off."

Clair Frisby, talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said:
"There's nothing like a big, hot sausage inside you on a cold night
Like this."

James Allen, interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Grand Prix, asked:
"What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?"

Steve Ryder, covering the USMasters:
"Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."

The new stand at Doncaster racecourse took Brough Scott's breath
away... "My word," he said. "Look at that magnificent erection."

Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big
race when he said:
"They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from
different positions."

Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live said:
"You'd eat beaver if you could get it."

A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed
and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked,
"So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too,
because they were laughing so hard!

USPGA Commentator -
"One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is laying so well is that,
before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ...
Oh my god!!!!! What have I just said?!!!!"

Metro Radio -
"Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."

Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 -
"Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing
the Cox of the Oxfordcrew."

Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - "This is really a lovely
Horse. I once rode her mother.

New Zealand Rugby Commentator -
"Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."

AND FINALLY!!!!

Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator -
"And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria, I saw her snatch this morning
and it was amazing!"
Have a GREAT day!!!