YOU ARE OLD WHEN.................

"OLD" IS WHEN ... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make
love," and you answer, "Pick one; I can't do both!"

"OLD" IS WHEN ... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator
shoes and you're barefoot.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker
opens the garage door.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... Going bra less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long
as you don't have to go along.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead
of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... "Getting a little action" means you don't need to
take any fibre today

"OLD" IS WHEN ... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... An "all nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom.

"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are not sure these are jokes .