MY DOCTOR

Let me tell you about my doctor. He's very good! If you tell him you
want a second opinion, He'll go out and come in again.

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He treated one woman for yellow jaundice for three years before he
realized she was Chinese.

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Another time, he gave a patient six months to live. At the end of the
six months, the patient hadn't paid his bill, So, the doctor gave him
another six months.

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While he was talking to me, his nurse came in and said, "Doctor, there
is a man here who thinks he's invisible." The doctor said, "Tell him I
can't see him."

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Another time, a man came running in the office and yelled, "Doctor,
doctor! - my son just swallowed a roll of film!" The doctor calmly
replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops."

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One patient came in and said, "Doctor, I have a serious memory
problem." The doctor asked,"When did it start?" The man replied, "When
did what start?"

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I remember one time I told my doctor I had a ringing in my ears. His
advice: "Don't answer it."

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My doctor sure has his share of nut cases. One said to him, "Doctor, I
think I'm a bell." The doctor gave him some pills and said, "Here,
take these - If they don't work, give me a ring."

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Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards.
The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later."

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When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places, He told me to stop
going to those places.

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You know, doctors can be so frustrating. You wait a month and a half
for an appointment, then he says, "I wish you had come to me sooner