Dr. Epstein

Dr. Epstein was a renowned physician who earned his undergraduate,
graduate and medical degrees in his hometown, and then left for
Manhattan, where he quickly rose to the top of his field.

Soon he was invited to deliver a significant paper at a conference,
coincidentally held in his hometown. He walked on stage and placed his
papers on the lectern, but they slid off onto the floor. As he bent
over to retrieve them, at precisely the wrong instant, he broke wind
stentorously.

The microphone amplified his mistake resoundingly through the room and
reverberating down the hall! He was appallingly embarrassed but
somehow regained his composure just enough to deliver his paper. He
ignored the applause and raced out the stage door, never to be seen
in his home town again.

Decades later, when his elderly mother was ill, he returned to visit
her. He reserved a hotel room under the name of Brown and arrived
under cover of darkness. The desk clerk asked him, "Is this your first
visit to our city, Mr. Brown?"

Dr. Epstein replied, "Well, young man, no, it isn't. I grew up here
and received my education here, but then I moved away."

"Why haven't you visited?" asked the desk clerk.

"Actually, I did visit once, many years ago, but a very embarrassing
thing happened, and since then I've been too ashamed to return."

The clerk consoled him. "Sir, while I don't have your life experience,
but one thing I have learned is that often what seems embarrassing to
me isn't even remembered by others. I'll bet that's true of your
incident too."

Dr. Epstein replied, "Son, I doubt that's the case with my incident."

"Was it a long time ago?"

"Yes, many years."

The clerk asked, "Was it before, or after the Epstein Fart?"