Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Fantastic reply to a Pretty Girl by CEO of J.P Morgan's

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:


Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this
year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a
guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy,
but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New
York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who
has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to
ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've
dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is
my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential
area on the west of New York CityGarden(?), $250k annual income is not
enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names
and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've met a
few girls who doesn't have looks and are not interesting, but they are
able to marry rich guys
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your
girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

Awesome reply:
Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of
girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me
to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income
is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone
believes that I'm not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a
business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very
simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you're trying
to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money": Person A provides
beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there's a
deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be
gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase
from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence
from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you
are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but
exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will
be much worried 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position,
dating with you is also a "trading position". If the trade value
dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long
term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel
to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with
great depreciation value will be sold or "leased". Anyone with over
$500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will
not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to
marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a
rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than
finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do
contact me...

signed,
J.P. Morgan