Blonde Jokes

A blonde & her husband are lying in bed Listening to the next door
neighbor's dog..

It has been in the backyard barking for hours & hours. The blonde
jumps up out of bed and says, "I've had enough of this". She goes
downstairs.

The blonde finally comes back up to bed And her husband says,  "The
dog is still barking, What have you been doing?"

The blonde says, "I put the dog in our backyard,
let's see how THEY like it! "

===================

Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in
movie?  They had gone to see "closed for the Winter."

====================

A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night with the tip
of her index finger shot off. "How did this happen?" the emergency
room doctor asked her.

"Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied.
"What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by shooting
off your finger?""No, Silly" the blonde said.

"First I put the gun to my chest, & then I thought, I just paid $6,
000.00 for these implants... I'm not shooting myself in the chest."

"So then?" asked the doctor. "Then I put the gun in my mouth, & I
thought, I just paid $3,000.00
to get my teeth straightened I'm not shooting myself in the mouth."

"So then?" "Then I put the gun to my ear, & I thought this is going to
make a loud noise. So I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled
the trigger."

A blonde was driving home after a game & got caught in a really bad
hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it
to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he
decided to have some fun... He told her to go home and blow into the
tail pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out.

So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands & knees & started
blowing into her tailpipe... Nothing happened... So she blew a little
harder, & still nothing happened.

Her blonde roommate saw her & asked, "What are you doing?" The first
Blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the
tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.

The roommate rolled her eyes & said, "Uh, like hello!
You need to roll up the windows first."

A blonde was shopping at Target & came across a shiny silver Thermos.
She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up & took It to the
clerk to ask what it was.

The clerk said, "Why, that's a thermos...it keeps hot things hot, and
cold things cold."

"Wow," said the blonde, "that's amazing...I'm going to buy it!" So she
bought the thermos & took it to work the next day.

Her boss saw it on her desk.  "What's that," he asked?
"Why, that's a thermos...it keeps hot things hot & cold things cold,"
she replied. Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?"

The blond replied, "Two popsicles & some coffee."