Lawyer

The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from the
city's most successful lawyer. So a United Way volunteer paid the
lawyer a visit in his lavish office.

The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, 'Our research shows that
even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't
give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to
your community through the United Way?'

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, 'First, did your research
also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness
and she has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to
pay?'

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, 'Uh... no, I didn't know that.'

'Secondly,' says the lawyer, ' did it show that my brother, a disabled
veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to
support his wife and six children?

The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an apology, but is cut off again.

'Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband
died in dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage
and three children, one of whom is disabled and another that has
learning disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?'

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, says, 'I'm so sorry,
I had no idea.'

And the lawyer says, 'So...if I didn't give any money to them, what
makes you think I'd give any to you?