Tuesday, April 07, 2015

Fwd: "No Jews please" - Touche

"No Jews please" - Touche



A U.S. Navy cruiser anchored in Mississippi for a week's shore leave.

The first evening, the ship's Captain received the following note from
the wife of a very wealthy and influential plantation owner:

"Dear Captain, Thursday will be my daughter's Debutante Ball. I would
like you to send four well-mannered, handsome, unmarried officers in
their formal dress uniforms to attend the dance."

"They should arrive promptly at 8:00 PM prepared for an evening of
polite Southern conversation. They should be excellent dancers, as
they will be the escorts of lovely refined young ladies. One last
point: "No Jews please."

Sending a written message by his own yeoman, the captain replied:
"Madam, thank you for your invitation. In order to present the widest
possible knowledge base for polite conversation, I am sending four of
my best and most prized officers."

"One is a lieutenant commander, and a graduate of Annapolis with an
additional Master's degree from MIT in fluid technologies and ship
design."

"The second is a Lieutenant, one of our helicopter pilots, and a
graduate of North-Western university in Chicago, with a BS in
Aeronautical Engineering. His Master's Degree and PhD. In Aeronautical
and Mechanical Engineering are from Texas Tech University and he is
also an astronaut candidate."

"The third officer is also a lieutenant, with degrees in both computer
systems and information technology from SMU and he is awaiting
notification on his Doctoral Dissertation from Cal Tech."

"Finally, the fourth officer, also a lieutenant commander, is our
ship's doctor, with an undergraduate degree from the University of
Georgia and his medical degree is from the University of North
Carolina. We are very proud of him, as he is also a senior fellow in
Trauma Surgery at Bethesda."

Upon receiving this letter, Melinda's mother was quite excited and
looked forward to Thursday with pleasure.

Her daughter would be escorted by four handsome naval officers without
peer (and the other women in her social circle would be insanely
jealous

At precisely 8:00 PM on Thursday, Melinda's mother heard a polite rap
at the door which she opened to find, in full dress uniform, four very
handsome, smiling Black officers.

Her mouth fell open, but pulling herself together, she stammered,
"There must be some mistake."

"No, Madam," said the first officer. "Captain Goldberg never makes mistakes."